I watched the President's speech and I am co-dependent
I watched President Obama’s speech last night and I found myself filled with anger. I dreamt about the speech and I awoke with anger. I watched bobble-head Nancy and I was angry. I watched the Republicans sit on their hands or wave their sheaf of papers in derision and I was filled with anger. I heard the Congressman from South Carolina shout at the President and call him a liar during his speech and I was filled with anger. And I saw the broad self-congratulatory smiles of the Democrats and I was filled with anger. As each individual aggrandized his own position I expressed derision.
This morning I asked myself to calm down and remove my anger so I could respond rationally. And almost immediately I realized that once again I am feeling co-dependent. Co-dependency occurs when an individual needs another person to complete himself. In the attempt for completion the individual must control the behavior of another to complete his self. In other words, if the “other” does what he wants and not what the co-dependent wants, the co-dependent individual is not complete because the other person is not conforming to the picture of the part of the co-dependent that the “other” is supposed to fill.
So, I am co-dependent with regard to Congress and the Senate. These people’s behavior simply does not conform to my view of how the world should be, how a government should govern, how a leader should lead. To me these people do not have integrity, are self serving, and do not engage in compromise for the good of the people. Did you notice bobble-head Nancy did not pop up and applaud when the President mentioned tort reform? That is because she and her friends are profiting from the laws she is writing. And that makes me mad. And I am co-dependent because I need bobble-head Nancy to believe as I do and vote as I wish her to do.
Maybe, just maybe, that is why the nation is angry. Maybe we are all co-dependent and so are our elected leaders. Maybe that is why we shout rather than talk, wave our fist rather than hug, respond before we hear what the other person has to say. I have been co-dependent all of my life. Still, I am going to recognize that I am responding with anger and intentionally put my anger aside. I am going to put my anger aside and respond to the obvious distortions of our leadership with more rational thoughts. I will recognize that when Sara Palin spews her vicious form of bigotry and hatred and spreads outright lies like we are promoting death camps for old people that I cannot control her behavior and I do not need her to complete me. I will continue to express my opinion and it will be my opinion.
I will also fall off the wagon. Fortunately I have an endearing wife who will coach me and maybe I will re-read this blog to remind myself that I can be part of the problem.
This morning I asked myself to calm down and remove my anger so I could respond rationally. And almost immediately I realized that once again I am feeling co-dependent. Co-dependency occurs when an individual needs another person to complete himself. In the attempt for completion the individual must control the behavior of another to complete his self. In other words, if the “other” does what he wants and not what the co-dependent wants, the co-dependent individual is not complete because the other person is not conforming to the picture of the part of the co-dependent that the “other” is supposed to fill.
So, I am co-dependent with regard to Congress and the Senate. These people’s behavior simply does not conform to my view of how the world should be, how a government should govern, how a leader should lead. To me these people do not have integrity, are self serving, and do not engage in compromise for the good of the people. Did you notice bobble-head Nancy did not pop up and applaud when the President mentioned tort reform? That is because she and her friends are profiting from the laws she is writing. And that makes me mad. And I am co-dependent because I need bobble-head Nancy to believe as I do and vote as I wish her to do.
Maybe, just maybe, that is why the nation is angry. Maybe we are all co-dependent and so are our elected leaders. Maybe that is why we shout rather than talk, wave our fist rather than hug, respond before we hear what the other person has to say. I have been co-dependent all of my life. Still, I am going to recognize that I am responding with anger and intentionally put my anger aside. I am going to put my anger aside and respond to the obvious distortions of our leadership with more rational thoughts. I will recognize that when Sara Palin spews her vicious form of bigotry and hatred and spreads outright lies like we are promoting death camps for old people that I cannot control her behavior and I do not need her to complete me. I will continue to express my opinion and it will be my opinion.
I will also fall off the wagon. Fortunately I have an endearing wife who will coach me and maybe I will re-read this blog to remind myself that I can be part of the problem.
Labels: health care reform
posted by Edward Lack MD at 6:49 AM
2 Comments:
In a way you have articulated my feelings too. I feel angry when I watch VIPs (very important persons!!!) in India protesting, gesticulating, shouting when they are frisked at airports IN INDIA but they don't (rather, can't)protest in foreign airports. I feel angry when I see human rights activists talking of terrorists' human rights but not of security personnel. After reading your blog I feel I too am co-dependent. I need these very people to show that I am angry when I see them not behaving in a way that I want them to. Yes, I too am co-dependent.
Your writings are always very interesting.
Dear Ed,
We are all angry because the guys on the front line are not at the table. You are so rIght that the people making the laws do sp in the name of protesting peoples rights but are actually motivated because they profit from them. There are so few physicians in Congress making laws; the trial lawyers outnumber us 100:1 or more. Doctors cannot form a union, it's against the law, the AMA only represents 23% of the physicians in the USA, and thus we are left with no unfied voice.
Well I just recently signed the "Physicians Appeal". It is so important that I thought I'd share it with your readers below. I'd encourage all our colleagues to sign the letter and vote on the Appeal at:
http://www.sermo.com/reform/sign_the_appeal
An Open Letter from America's Physicians
Dear Fellow Americans,
For decades the United States has led the world in healthcare. We have enjoyed the finest hospitals, medical schools, research, technology, and resources. Unfortunately, our healthcare system has lost focus to the point where patient well-being is placed after politics, profits, and special interests. Healthcare costs are on the rise and patients have lost their freedom of choice. These trends are hurting our economy and compromising the doctor-patient relationship. As a result, it has become difficult for physicians to deliver the best possible care.
Our heavily fragmented healthcare system has made it very difficult for you, the American public, to get the care you need. As your physicians, we want to partner with you to address the critical defects of the system as outlined below:
You are paying a lot for healthcare and not receiving enough in return. Your insurance premiums continue to increase while your healthcare options are dwindling. Gatekeepers, insurance networks, and restrictive regulations limit your choice of doctors and your access to care.
You have been made dependent on complicated and expensive health insurance plans. Employers are forced to take money out of your paycheck to purchase health coverage. If you lose your job, you are left with no safety net and the money you have paid for health coverage vanishes.
The time you spend with your physician has become remarkably brief due to regulatory hurdles requiring doctors to spend more time on documentation than with you.
We believe the following factors have made our current healthcare system unsustainable:
The insurance industry's undue authority and oppressive control over healthcare processes
Excessive and misguided government regulation
The practice of defensive medicine in response to a harmful and costly legal environment
We, the physicians of the United States, will no longer remain silent. We will not tolerate a healthcare system where those without medical expertise or genuine interest in our patients' health have absolute control. This letter is merely a summary of the most important problems in our current system. We believe that by partnering with the public we can start to demand real change and formulate practical solutions.
We invite you, our patients, friends, neighbors, and employers to unite with us at this important time in the history of healthcare in the United States. Together, we can guarantee our nation a healthier tomorrow.
Please talk to your doctor about this letter and visit www.sermo.com/doctorsunite for more information.
Respectfully,
The Undersigned U.S. Physicians
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